![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Argh.
So there's this dichotomy:
μέν: This morning I processed a couple of letters* addressed to "Herrn X,** Department of Y, Z University". And something inside me wondered, Why don't I get letters to Herrn Schreiber anymore? Why don't I have a REAL job, doing something prestigious, corresponding internationally? Why, basically, am I eating these husks?
δε: On Friday, as some of you know, I left my credit card at a Friendly's. Sunday night, I was attempting to remove the air conditioner that my roommate had lent me from my window...
You know those scenes - in movies, in dreams - where something drops into the bottomless pit, while the protagonist scrambles frantically to hold onto it? Well, I recreated that with the AC.
Fortunately, there wasn't anything underneath it other than my landlady's lawn, so only the AC got totaled.
But now, thanks to my klutzhood, I am temporarily without a credit card, and out the cost of a replacement air conditioner, and it's times like these - note I say LIKE these - that I wonder why I'm even allowed to go on existing at all.
I want to be able to forgive myself, so that I can enjoy this week*** ...but that's going to be hard. And unfortunately, I could call up my parents, but ... ...actually, let's not get into that.
σύνθεσις: 1. Either way, thinking about these things makes me feel terrible.
2. On a partly unrelated note, Maybe I should go back on antidepressants. I stopped because μέν they weren't making me happy per se, δε so I possibly needed some other combination of drugs, but for THAT I really want an actual qualified psychiatrist prescribing 'em, and I don't really have the time to do all those appointments, δε I could manage without the drugs, wasn't suffering from anhedonia or anything. But I'm having trouble...humaning, as I think of the verb.
More about this later, maybe.
3. ...I should finish this up, and try to get my smart phone activated before my lunch break is up.
* among 2000+.
** For non-linguists: Herrn is the accusative form of the German Herr: letters in the German-speaking world are usually addressed "Herrn [or Frau] X".
μέν and δε are Greek particles: both have multiple meanings, but the important thing is that they are used to set up sentences in the form of "On the one hand...but on the other hand..." My Greek textbook REALLY liked this construction, so it got used a LOT, and consequently it's one of the things I actually remember.
*** The non-work parts are going to be pretty awesome! Work, not so much, but...
So there's this dichotomy:
μέν: This morning I processed a couple of letters* addressed to "Herrn X,** Department of Y, Z University". And something inside me wondered, Why don't I get letters to Herrn Schreiber anymore? Why don't I have a REAL job, doing something prestigious, corresponding internationally? Why, basically, am I eating these husks?
δε: On Friday, as some of you know, I left my credit card at a Friendly's. Sunday night, I was attempting to remove the air conditioner that my roommate had lent me from my window...
You know those scenes - in movies, in dreams - where something drops into the bottomless pit, while the protagonist scrambles frantically to hold onto it? Well, I recreated that with the AC.
Fortunately, there wasn't anything underneath it other than my landlady's lawn, so only the AC got totaled.
But now, thanks to my klutzhood, I am temporarily without a credit card, and out the cost of a replacement air conditioner, and it's times like these - note I say LIKE these - that I wonder why I'm even allowed to go on existing at all.
I want to be able to forgive myself, so that I can enjoy this week*** ...but that's going to be hard. And unfortunately, I could call up my parents, but ... ...actually, let's not get into that.
σύνθεσις: 1. Either way, thinking about these things makes me feel terrible.
2. On a partly unrelated note, Maybe I should go back on antidepressants. I stopped because μέν they weren't making me happy per se, δε so I possibly needed some other combination of drugs, but for THAT I really want an actual qualified psychiatrist prescribing 'em, and I don't really have the time to do all those appointments, δε I could manage without the drugs, wasn't suffering from anhedonia or anything. But I'm having trouble...humaning, as I think of the verb.
More about this later, maybe.
3. ...I should finish this up, and try to get my smart phone activated before my lunch break is up.
* among 2000+.
** For non-linguists: Herrn is the accusative form of the German Herr: letters in the German-speaking world are usually addressed "Herrn [or Frau] X".
μέν and δε are Greek particles: both have multiple meanings, but the important thing is that they are used to set up sentences in the form of "On the one hand...but on the other hand..." My Greek textbook REALLY liked this construction, so it got used a LOT, and consequently it's one of the things I actually remember.
*** The non-work parts are going to be pretty awesome! Work, not so much, but...
